DATE: 25/05/07 to 01/06/07Hadtih/athar: "Abu Hurayra said: "A man came to the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) and said, ‘Messenger of Allah, I have relatives with whom I maintain connections while they cut me off. I am good to them while they are bad to me, they behave towards me like fools while I am forbearing towards them.’ The Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) said, ‘If things are as you say have said, it is as if you were putting hot ashes on them* and you will not lack a supporter against them from Allah as long as you continue to do that.’"
*i.e. it will cause them harm if they continue with their behaviour but will not harm you as it will result in their humiliation and you will gain respect in this world and the Hereafter.
Reported by Muslim also. Saheeh isnad and matn.
Ibn Abi Hatim in the chain. Faqih from the tabi’ tabi’in. Known to be as knowledgeable as Imam Malik who himself said "if there is a people and among them is Ibn Abi Hatim, they will be protected." Imam Malik not known for over-praising and exaggerating; known for being austere and serious. He was probably referring to Imam Ibn Abi Hatim’s taqwa, being a wali of Allah, rather than knowledge and qada.
Man knows what he’s doing is obligatory. He’s not approaching the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) to be excused from it, he wants to know what he (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) has to say about the matter. The behaviour of his relatives akin to their own punishment. His good treatment and their bad treatment in return is like humiliation for them. Essence of maintaining kinship is difficulty, not what is easy and nice.
Repayment of good with mere neutrality is shameful. But replacement of good with bad is evil.
"If it is as you said" – allows for another side to the story, possibility of reality not being the mentioned scenario. In fatwa-seeking always a hidden side mufti doesn’t know hence he should be careful and prudent when giving verdicts. REAL men of knowledge past and present shied away from giving fatwa whereas many of us rush to give our opinion in deen matters. Should be cautious rather than hasty.
Lesson for general mass: speak and convey news and information in balanced, just and accurate manner.
"Putting hot ashes" – causing someone to get punished. Should he and others like him then not continue god treatment? No as they themselves are the cause for their own punishment. Statement following it encourages the man to continue if his good behaviour.
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